Wiffle Brief - June 16, 2026

SMBA WIFFLE BRIEF – JUNE 16, 2026

Night Seven of the 2026 Season | Games 25-28

Six teams take the field in the penultimate night of SMBA Wiffle Ball 2026.  Three survive and three rest their case for the season. Along the way, giants will be toppled. Perhaps because three stellar players and team captains are missing.  Conspiracy? No. Improperly noticed vacations? Yes. Solution:  Any and all future PTO requests must clear wiffle ball season!

GAME 25: LET FREEDOM SWING V. GIDEON'S SOLDIERS

(Twibell Pierson v. Public Defenders)

Two teams on the same side of the courtroom find themselves on opposite sides of the diamond tonight. Let Freedom Swing (hereinafter “LFS”) takes the field with only three players, including Preppy Pierson, who sprints in straight from the courthouse in khaki pants and shoes with absolutely zero traction. Look for this one to include some surprises, grass stains and equipment casualties.

Let Freedom Swing: Scott Pierson, Bryan Delleville, Tarek Masri

Gideon's Soldiers: Scott Skocy, Sam Reed, Daniel Newell, Luke Dainty, Blake Burchard, Nathan Beaver, Cory Guinn

First inning

Newell walks for the Soldiers and Dainty rips a triple to drive him in. LFS answers right back — Masri sends one clean OVER the chain link fence for a HOME RUN. Soldiers 1, LFS 1.

Second inning

Delleville takes the mound and retires the Soldiers three up, three down. Then Delleville steps to the plate and lofts a beauty that hangs in the sky just long enough for Skocy to track it down on the way back to earth. Out.

Third inning:

Dainty and Burchard both walk, and Beaver rips one past Pierson for a triple, plating two. LFS up, Delleville makes contact and Newell responds for the out. Soldiers 3, LFS 1.

Fourth inning:

Dainty and Burchard walk again. Guinn pops one up to Pierson for the out. LFS roars back: Pierson blasts a HOME RUN! Who needs traction when you have style.  Delleville follows with an emphatic double that collapses the sawhorse on impact.  The score edges closer as we enter the final inning. Soldiers 3, LFS 2

Fifth inning:

Soldiers at bat - three up, three down. Pressure is on – LFS needs one to stay in it and two to walk off.  Delleville at bat.  AND HE DELIVERS.  Delleville joins the home run club with a detonation that ties the game. WE ARE HEADED TO EXTRA INNINGS. Soldiers 3, LFS 3.

Sixth inning:

Burchard doubles and Guinn sends one into triple territory in left — Pierson dives for it, sacrificing his shoulder and his oxford cloth shirt, but the ball wins. RBI for Guinn. Dainty takes the mound and keeps deploying his trademark wiffle fastball (seriously, how does he do that?) for a clean three up, three down to close it out. Reigning champs, LFS are out for the season but we will see them next year with new recruits.

Final Score: Gideon's Soldiers 4, Let Freedom Swing 3

GAME 26: DOJ TURKEYS V. USUAL SUSPECTS

(Department of Justice v. Criminal Defense Pals)

DOJ Turkeys: Hannah Lucas, Kaylee Comer, Casey Clark, Stephanie Wan

Usual Suspects: Matt Russell, Adam Woody, Ben Stringer, Sara Meier, Elizabeth Killion, Ty Harden, Stuart Huffman

Acting Team Captain Lucas wins the coin toss like a boss and takes her Turkeys to the field.

Top of the first:

Clark pitching. Russell lines one to left where Clark intercepts for the out. Stringer nonchantly steps to the plate then JOINS THE HOME RUN CLUB on the first pitch he sees. Game paused briefly for newly appointed SMBA Wiffle Ball Mascot, Cooper the Labradoodle, who casually wanders onto the field and just as casually wanders back off.

Bottom of the first:

Huffman pitching. Lucas triples, Comer doubles. Clark's hit is intercepted by Woody for a magical catch and out. Wan takes one off the hip and a free base. Bases loaded. Comer doubles again, two RBI. Clark steps up and hits a HOME RUN for three more RBI. Lucas hits to Woody and is out, but the Turkeys have built themselves a tidy lead. Usual Suspects 1, Turkeys 6.

Top of the second:

Meier's hit is scooped backhanded by Clark for the out. Killion, Huffman, and Russell all walk to load the bases. Woody lines one past Clark to Lucas and is out. Stringer walks, forcing in a run. Meier is out.

Bottom of the second:

Comer hits to Woody and is out. Clark sends a highflyer to Harden for the out. Wan is out. Usual Suspects 2, DOJ Turkeys 6.

Top of the third:

Killion walks. Harden gets hit by pitch and takes the base. Huffman and Russell are both out. Woody and Stringer walk, with Stringer's walk forcing in a run. Meier is out, but the Usual Suspects post another run on the board.

Bottom of the third:

Clark triples and Lucas hits to Killion for the out. Comer is out. Clark then powers one deep into the tree in left field, where Woody — in a maneuver best described as awkward but undeniably effective — crouches, flops underneath the tree with his back to the field, and catches it clean on the bounce. Out. Usual Suspects 3, DOJ Turkeys 6.

Top of the fourth:

Comer takes the mound. Killion hits to Wan and is out. Harden reaches on a hit-by-pitch, Huffman and Russell both walk to load the bases. Woody hits to Clark for the out, and Stringer hits to Clark.  Ditto, out.

Bottom of the fourth:

Wan takes another one off the hip and a base. Lucas hits to Huffman and is out. Comer's power hit goes to Russell for the out. Clark threads a line drive through the legs of the sawhorse but Meier is on it like a duck on a Junebug. Out.

Top of the fifth:

Killion knocks one deep to left. Clark settles under it, the ball hits his hands with such force it re-launches. He catches it again on the way down. Out. Harden and Huffman are both retired, and that's the ballgame.  Usual Suspects leave the field and the season with their best stats to date. 

Final Score: Usual Suspects 3, DOJ Turkeys 6

GAME 27: GIDEON'S SOLDIERS V. DOJ TURKEYS

(Public Defenders v. DOJ)

Game 27 pits the winners of the evening's first two games against each other for the right to advance to the finals next week. Two great teams who have performed very well this season.  It’s anyone's game — or so we thought.

Gideon's Soldiers Batting Order: Scott Skocy, Sam Reed, Daniel Newell, Luke Dainty, Blake Burchard, Nathan Beaver

DOJ Turkeys Batting Order: Hannah Lucas, Kaylee Comer, Casey Clark, Stephanie Wan

Top of the first:

Skocy and Reed walk, Guinn is hit by pitch, and the bases are loaded before anyone's even broken a sweat. Dainty steps up and fires a triple into the power pole in right field for three RBI — no electricity was lost in the making of this hit. Burchard and Newell both take HBP bases to load things up again. Skocy then cannons one to the top of the fence in right. Home run or triple? The game pauses while Clark goes hunting deep in the brush, and after a tense search, emerges holding the excavated ball triumphantly overhead. Ruling: triple, three RBI for Skocy. Reed is out, Guinn singles. Dainty comes back up and does it again — ANOTHER HOME RUN, three more RBI. Burchard and Newell reach on HBP and Skocy triples them both home for two RBI. Reed reaches on HBP and Dainty brings him home with yet another triple, two RBI. At this point everyone on the field — and this reporter — is thoroughly exhausted. Gideon's Soldiers post an eye-watering 15 runs in a single inning, and the mercy rule is invoked lest we be here all night.

Bottom of the first:

Lucas hits to Guinn and is out. Comer and Clark are also retired. Gideon's Soldiers 15, Turkeys 0.

Top of the second:

Clark pitching. Newell walks. Skocy steps up this time and crushes a no-doubt-about-it HOME RUN, WAY OVER THE CHAIN LINK FENCE. Two RBI. Reed is out. Guinn is caught out by Comer. Dainty hits ANOTHER HOME RUN for the Soldiers. Burchard pops one to Comer for the out.

Bottom of the second:

Wan is out. Lucas triples. Clark triples her home for an RBI. Comer is out. The Turkeys get on the scoreboard. Gideon's Soldiers 18, Turkeys 1.

Top of the third:

Newell walks. Skocy triples for an RBI. Reed walks. Guinn is out. Dainty hits to Clark and is out. Burchard and Newell both walk, and Reed brings them both home with a triple, two RBI. Two more runs are bagged but the details are lost to history. 

Bottom of the third:

Lucas walks and Comer triples her in. Clark lofts a highflyer to Skocy for the out. Wan walks. Lucas is out. Comer hits to Guinn and is out. The Turkeys add a second run this inning, but when the umpire and the wiffle ball commissioner confer and call the game, there are no objections and no motions to reconsider. Good run, Turkeys. This one was a bit of a slaughter but you went down swinging.

Final Score: Gideon's Soldiers 23, DOJ Turkeys 2

GAME 28: MCGLOVENS V. BENCHWARMERS

(Kutak Rock v. Spencer Fane)

A battle of big law to close out the night. The weather has mellowed and the vibe feels downright chill on this warm summer evening — but appearances may deceive, because these are the only two undefeated teams left in the entire series.

McGlovens: Joseph Reid, Taylor White, Collin Elliott

Benchwarmer:: Doug Reynolds, Alden Smith, Jacob Sappington, Kenzie Hatman,

Jason Smith

Top of the first:

Sappington pitching. Reid sets the tone immediately, slamming a hit into the privacy fence for a triple. Elliott follows and bats him in with another triple. Reid is out to J. Smith. White is out to J. Smith. McGlovens take the field with one run on the board.

Bottom of the first:

Reid pitching. Reynolds is out. A. Smith hits to Elliott and is out. Hatman is out.

McGlovens 1, Benchwarmers 0.

Top of the second:

Sappington pitching. Elliott hits to A. Smith and is out. Reid is out. White lobs a high fly to Reynolds for the out.

Bottom of the second:

Reid pitching. J. Smith is out. Sappington drives one past the first sawhorse to Elliott and is out. Reynolds is out.

Top of the third:

Sappington pitching. Elliott leads off with a MAGNIFICENT HOME RUN clean through the tree in far center field. Reid hits to A. Smith for the out in a play that's both understated and impressive in equal measure. Elliott triples to far center. Reid hurls one directly at Reynolds for the out.

Bottom of the third:

Reid pitching. A. Smith hits a single that's impossible to catch and comes to a dead stop about a foot from home plate. Summer Associate Hatman doubles. J. Smith is out. Sappington sends one to center field, where Elliot nearly collides with White going after it — White makes the catch for the out.

McGlovens 2, Benchwarmers 0.

Top of the fourth:

Sappington pitching. White powers one past Sappington, past Reynolds, and finally into the glove of A. Smith for the out. Elliott triples. Reid hits to A. Smith and is out. White reaches on a hit-by-pitch. Elliott triples again, two RBI — with props due to A. Smith for a dedicated, if unsuccessful, diving attempt. Reid fires one into the tree but is ultimately caught out.

Bottom of the fourth:

Reid pitching. A. Smith hits to Reid, caught on the bounce, out. Hatman is out. J. Smith hits to Reid and is out. The Benchwarmers seem to have warning-track power tonight, while the McGlovens quietly creep ahead with two more this inning.

McGlovens 4, Benchwarmers 0.

Top of the fifth:

Sappington pitching. White triples despite another nearly heroic intercept attempt by A. Smith — is that A. for effort? Elliott hits one to Sappington, who shows off cat-like reflexes with a jump, roll, and catch for the out. Reid and White each triple for an RBI. Elliott follows with a double. Reid hits to Reynolds and is out. White walks to load the bases with Elliott up next — and he triples, three RBI through the deep shrubs. Reid reaches on a hit and base. White follows with a HOME RUN, THREE MORE RBI. Elliott crushes one into the wood fence for a triple. Reid doubles, White doubles him home for an RBI. Elliott hits to Reynolds for the out. The gloves are officially off for the McGlovens this inning — seven runs in a single frame.

Bottom of the fifth:

Reid takes the mound and shuts the door with three quick outs to close out the inning and the game.

Final Score: McGlovens 11, Benchwarmers 0